Update…..

Wow… I haven’t updated since my first post.

Not that it matters, since I don’t think I’ll have very many readers after only one post. Really, I have been working on something to put here, but nothing I write seems to say what I want it to.

In the meantime, I’m going to post an exceedingly over-dramatic,  monologue-esque thing that I wrote on the 2nd of October 2005. Which is probably a stupid idea, since I was 16 back then, and I always end up embarrassed about things I wrote ages ago.

The reason I am posting it, is firstly because I need to update this, and secondly because I actually think it’s better than anything I’ve written recently. (If it’s better than anything I’ve written recently, and I’m embarrassed about posting old things.. then how much more stupid will I feel for posting recent stuff?) And thirdly, it makes me see how much I have to improve and in what areas.

It kind of makes me wonder why I was better at writing then, than I am now.

well anyway… here it is (and hopefully I won’t cringe too much because of it).

You are right in front of me
But I can’t reach out.
I can’t even say the words
That my lips are longing to let go.
You’re holding me back
Without even so much as a glance.
You’ve built an un-breakable barrier-
Made of the little things.
You know them all…
The broken promises and half-lies-
The little things that hurt me most.
You weaved them all together.
A carefully constructed wall,
A bitter, painful obstacle,
Set in the space between us
To keep us apart.

It seems that my childish dreams
Are just to stay as dreams.
Wishes for un-slept nights,
On cloud hidden stars.
They’ll not disappear so easily;
Part of you is still here,
Trapped inside my heart.
How can I let you go,
When you wont let me close enough
To give this piece of you back?

(on a side note, I can’t really remember who it’s written about or if it’s even written from my point of view. I’d forgotten I’d written it until I found it the other day.)